I feel like writing a lot today
So normally I wouldn't post two blogs on the same day, but I just feel like writing today!! This post may be a bit of a venting 'session' (do you like that Mom? Haha....*shudder*) so you can stop now if you want to. You probably won't miss much.
Have any of you dreaded going onto the next day because you feel like you messed everything up? It's as if you did something you know you were supposed to do, but you did it in a way that was just STUPID.....anyone ever feel like that? Because that's how I feel. That's how I've felt since Thursday night. And what do you do about it? Sometimes if you try to fix it things will just get worse. And I'm pretty sure that would happen to me. Maybe that's just how somethings work and there's no getting around it. You just have to stare at it and hope it dissolves because you can't do anything about it.
Maybe you had a great idea and knew you had to implement it....so you did without giving it much thought. Then later on when your idea wasn't accepted the way you wanted it to be you look back and see that the way you implemented it wasn't the best way you could have done it. If the way you wanted to introduce your idea had been given a lot more thought things could have gone much more smoothly...but now your idea is out, people have their own thoughts about it and nothing you do can change what they think about it because of how you've presented it. There's nothing you can do!!! Damage has been done and your life changing idea was not life changing because it was implemented hastily. I hate when that happens. Because then the people who are affected by the idea don't understand it as well or aren't as accepting of it.....*sigh*
So, the question is, do you risk making the people think you're an idiot, pushing to much and bring it up again? What if you've brought it up after the idea has been put out there but you brought it up stupidly again? And again?! But then you realize what you should have been doing the whole time after the fourth time of bringing it up....and you feel that if you do bring it up again it will go better this fifth time because you know what you've been doing wrong? Or will bringing it up again just annoy the people...maybe drive them further away? That's probably what's going to happen...maybe I won't bring it up and go on wondering what would have happened had I brought up this idea. But is it worth wondering about forever? Is the risk of driving the people away further away worth bringing it up again?? I hate not knowing.
Have any of you dreaded going onto the next day because you feel like you messed everything up? It's as if you did something you know you were supposed to do, but you did it in a way that was just STUPID.....anyone ever feel like that? Because that's how I feel. That's how I've felt since Thursday night. And what do you do about it? Sometimes if you try to fix it things will just get worse. And I'm pretty sure that would happen to me. Maybe that's just how somethings work and there's no getting around it. You just have to stare at it and hope it dissolves because you can't do anything about it.
Maybe you had a great idea and knew you had to implement it....so you did without giving it much thought. Then later on when your idea wasn't accepted the way you wanted it to be you look back and see that the way you implemented it wasn't the best way you could have done it. If the way you wanted to introduce your idea had been given a lot more thought things could have gone much more smoothly...but now your idea is out, people have their own thoughts about it and nothing you do can change what they think about it because of how you've presented it. There's nothing you can do!!! Damage has been done and your life changing idea was not life changing because it was implemented hastily. I hate when that happens. Because then the people who are affected by the idea don't understand it as well or aren't as accepting of it.....*sigh*
So, the question is, do you risk making the people think you're an idiot, pushing to much and bring it up again? What if you've brought it up after the idea has been put out there but you brought it up stupidly again? And again?! But then you realize what you should have been doing the whole time after the fourth time of bringing it up....and you feel that if you do bring it up again it will go better this fifth time because you know what you've been doing wrong? Or will bringing it up again just annoy the people...maybe drive them further away? That's probably what's going to happen...maybe I won't bring it up and go on wondering what would have happened had I brought up this idea. But is it worth wondering about forever? Is the risk of driving the people away further away worth bringing it up again?? I hate not knowing.
I completely agree. I have had those moments, and gone through similar experiences wishing I could change a person's thoughts to think the way I did. My favorite scripture this week I feel I must share with you is a short one, but it has a good message: "For we walk by faith, not by sight." 2 Cor. 5:7
ReplyDeleteKeep having faith like I know you do, and everything will turn out right. :) I love you Amelia!
It's easy to look back and say you should have done things differently. It's not so easy to see how other people will interpret what you do and say before you do. And feeling like you messed it up happens sometimes (or often) even when you try to be really careful. People are just unpredictable. But I do tend to be one of those who says, hey, let me try one more time to fix this. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. Soon, though, you'll have to stop beating yourself up and let it go, knowing that your intentions were good. Sigh. Love you!
ReplyDeleteMother: I guess I hadn't thought about that....you have seen a lot more of the world and mistakes than I have so I'll try to stop beating myself up because I love you too. :)
ReplyDeleteMabel:Thank you for that scripture. It is SO relevant and you more than anyone should know that. I love you as well!